August 18, 2009 - Msg 74639:
Correction Boo, a "novel" is fiction,
but this stuff is the real McCoy! And GOOD stuff too!
Thanks for sharing.
Did BO's speech here in Phx to the VFW make the national news? Lots of protesters on both sides of the HC issue. but ya gotta love America! Both sides were
peaceful and no one was carted away because of their views!
BTW, were any porchsters at Woodstock 40 years ago. A friend of mine wanted to drive his VW bug
cross-country to go, and me to go with him, but
it was the weekend of jr. college registration,
and the only way to register for classes back then was to stand in lines all day to get the classes that you wanted. As i look back, I think I made the right choice! He did too. He stayed to register, and today is an AmEx VP !!
BARN: "Now Opie, arithmitic is one subject that you will use all your life..."
August 18, 2009 - Msg 74640:
OK, I cleaned up the "farm!" ha
August 18, 2009 - Msg 74641:
You're welcome, MDC...happy to share.
I was only 8 the year of Woodstock. Too bad you didn't go. You would have had alot to talk about, I'll bet. I can see you out there dancing with the hippies (after rolling around in the mud like they did), in your tie-dye and a headband....NOT! You looked like the clean-cut type in the pictures I have seen.
August 18, 2009 - Msg 74642:
Sorry gang....having to train this afternoon at work....busy busy...any supper?...SPOT
August 18, 2009 - Msg 74643:
Nope,no Woodstock for me either,as I was only 10 yrs. old then-a mere YOUT (had to get that "YOUT" in there somehow,right,Spot?!) but I can remember my stepsister telling me that she had begged her mother to let her go to Woodstock,but she wouldn't allow her. She was probably around 16-17.Instead,her mom sent her to SC to stay with her dad (my stepdad) and us for the summer. Wish she'd had gone to Woodstock instead- talk about a wicked stepsister- Eww! Ha!
Speaking of Woodstock, Crosby,Stills & Nash are playing in Charleston TONIGHT and I'm stuck here at my rock. Would just love to see them. Well, I'll put on a CD-it's much cheaper!
Laci had a very good first day of Kindergarten,by the way- hooray!
Spot,what do ya want to eat? How about: (channeling Peter Brady) "Pork Chops and Applesauce?!"
possum under a rock
August 18, 2009 - Msg 74644:
"by the time I got to woodstock..."
August 18, 2009 - Msg 74645:
Possum- That sounds better than the snails and brains that we had last night! Not exactly the "surf and turf" that I was after. teehee
Wow, C S & N right there "a half a million strong."
I always wonder "what if?" of that trip that I never took. But i think the Lord was really with me on that one in turning it down. Yup, never was the hippie type, but I did get a "beatle cut" in
high school! ha
Now if I did that it would be more of a tonsorial! (:
APB for M-T. The new Hogette must be keeping him
August 18, 2009 - Msg 74646:
Fix me a plate possum......thanks SPOT
August 18, 2009 - Msg 74647:
Get some rain today help some, but can used some more
I'm about to giveup on the stetdad because we will not do wite the Doc tell him to wind ir come to his med.
I give to fight him to used the oxygen at all time, he said he did not want it all the time.
TOM gong nut
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74648:
Good evening, all. Woodstock? Hmmm. 1969. I was married and a month away from having my fourth child when Woodstock took place. Needless to say, I didn't go. Never felt like I missed much.
Tom, I'm hearing a lot of frustration, fear and fatigue in what you're writing about your stepdad. Dear friend, maybe it's time for a different approach. Your stepdad is at a point in his life where he has very little control over things around him. Due to his health, he can't get out and do much. So, he fights with you and makes an issue out of his medications. That gets attention from you, and lets him feel like he's controlling things a little.
Since nothing else seems to be working, why don't you just let go for a while. Tell him that you know he's a grown man and can make his own decisions. If he doesn't want to use his oxygen or take his medicine, then that's fine. It won't be long until he'll be feeling so bad that he'll decide he wants them, and it will be HIS decision. It won't be you, pushing them at him.
I've used this idea many times, when I worked with elderly folks at the hospital. I'd take their meds to them, and I've had them slapped out of my hand, or spit out, or any of a dozen annoying things. I just tell them it's okay, they don't have to take them if they don't want them, and I walk out of the room. Almost always, they'll call me back in a little while and tell me they've "changed their mind" and have decided to take the pills. Their idea - see how it works?
I don't know for sure that it will work with your stepdad, but it's worth a try. Arguing with him is obviously not working.
I'm glad you got some rain. We sure do need some, but it doesn't look like we're going to get it. One tiny black cloud squatted overhead this afternoon, dropped exactly three drops of water on me as I walked across a parking lot, and then went away. Oh well.
I'm off to cuddle little Starr for a while, watch a little TAGS on DVD, and to bed. Blessings, everyone. --Romeena
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74649:
Night Romeena...Tom Romeena made a good point..possum thanks for the grub..still busy here with 2 broke poles crews are changing out..Asa,Boo,Hazel,.......and Lucy,MDC,auh20,Tom...will check back in a bit to see if yall are up...SPOT
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74650:
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74651:
Well MDC, good thing you didn't go to Woodstock or you might have smoked one of them "funny" cigarettes and dropped some acid...you might have liked it and ended up with three brain cells (like Ozzie Osbourne). Yikes.
"Make love, not war!"
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74652:
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74653:
Well I was 10 when woodstock exploded on the scene..well the crews got all power restored here at woek at about 4:00am...all is well...they are going home to get some rest like me...I dont have to be back till 10pm tonight for a rare 8 hr shift!..then after that off for 6 days...well lets see breakfast...humm..ok..ok..a stack of wheets with maple syurp, 2 eggs over easy (not runny)toast,sausage,bacon,hashbrowns,grits, oj,coffee,milk...prayers to all in need and may all of you have a blessed mayberry type day!..Rev if yer at home show up for b-fast if not watch for the UPS truck!...SPOT
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74654:
Good morning porch family,sorry it's been awhile, I've been busier than a two chair barber shop here lately. Thanks for breakfast Spot, gonna do some major house cleaning today, then take a break and do some reading and see what I've missed. Ya'll have a blessed day love you all--Salty Dog
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74655:
Good morning all.
Hey Salty, good to see you. Slow down, take it easy. What's your hurry?
Tom, Romeena offered you some wise thoughts. I'm sorry you are going through such a struggle. But as Romeena pointed out, this is not uncommon with older folks. You are in my prayers friend.
No Woodstock here either. I guess I was 13 0r 14 at the time. Didn't get it the. Don't get it now. In all honesty when I see the footage of the thing I smell B.O. lol All them bodies together in the hot summer sun, and lets face it, them hippies were not noted for hygiene.
Breakfast sounds good Spot.
N.N. Still waiting for your report.
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74656:
A six day vacation, SPOT? How wonderful! Going to the lake or anything?
Good to see you, SALTY!
How true, ASA (about woodstock). The smell must have been really terrible (if you could smell anything but the marajuana in the air). I have heard some pretty awful stories about it. Sounds as bad as mardi gras. Have done that and couldn't believe what I saw on Bourbon St.! Wow. Any of you done Mardi Gras?
Coffee is gone and lots to do. Hey, guess what? There are some rain clouds in the sky! Maybe we will actually get a little rain today.
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74657:
Good morning everyone. Hope you all are well. WE are on this end of the porch.
All this talk about Woodstock. Yep, I bet it was stinky. Thepeace and love stuff is one thing; the gross hair and foul body odor is another. I'll offer this quote from P.J. O'Rourke: "Oh, no. The Sixties are coming back. Well I've got a 12-gauge double-barreled duck gun chambered for three-inch Magnum shells. And--speaking strictly for this retired hippie and former pinko beatnik--if the Sixties head my way, they won't get past the porch steps. They will be history. Which, for Pete's sake, is what they're supposed to be." (I did edit a few words.)
Prayers for all, esepcially TOM today.
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74658:
Yeah, but it was so ther-a-pi-tic? haha
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74659:
Nope,never been to Mardi Gras either. Never really wanted to. And I don't think I'd have wanted to go to Woodstock either,though I love the music of that time.
Latest news from possum's rock is that Laci clapped when they pulled up to the school this am,and a little red haired boy in her class grinned at her & she blew him a kiss. Second day in Kindergarten- oh brother!
Oh,and Andy & family have made it into Wyoming. About 5 hours to get to where they plan to live. From SC to Wyoming in 4 days-that's a LOT of driving.
Speaking of Woodstock again,and the Summer of Love.. wonder how many hipies had to go and get themselves INARCULATED after the Love Fest? Ha!
possum under a rock
P.S. Sorry about your trouble with your stepdad,Tom.
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74660:
HIPPIES,not hipies, that is.
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74661:
Where is everyone?
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74662:
I'm rite-chere! Been out mousin' around with Eloise and our grandson, Landry. Had good Mexican food at El Fenix, then sat in her living room for a while, watching Landry build stuff out of Legos. I declare, that boy can take all those little bitty pieces, start snapping them together and next thing you know, he's got a car or a truck, or a boat or a building - amazing! He uses the kits sometimes, but usually just takes a pile of pieces and lets his imagination run wild.
Possum, you may have already told us this, but does Andy's family have a place to live already secured? I'm sure they do - big city, small town, country? Please keep us updated. I really hope Andy can eventually see this as an adventure, a learning opportunity, and get the most out of it. After all, he can always move back eventually. A couple of years will change his perspective dramatically.
Well, I think I'll go put my feet up for a while. Hard to leave this window right now, though, with a precious little hummingbird visiting the feeder just outside and a gorgeous black and yellow butterfly with a six-inch wingspan visiting the lantana. Things like that are the magnets that hold me in this spot.
Be blessed, friends. --Romeena
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74663:
I'm here,too- guess everybody else is over at the Grand watching them change the marquee,Ro.
About Andy & family- nope,no place to live and school starts on the 26th for his 11 year old sister.They picked a small town in Western Wyoming,near some Indian Reservation- VERY different than the Lowcountry of South Carolina! The plan is for Andy to go to a community college about 25 miles away. Will he be in a dorm? Commute in the snow from the home they don't have yet? I have no idea. They only told us so much an then it was "Westward Ho!"I pray constantly for them,especially Andy,remembering that he told me he's going to look at it like a vacation in order to deal with it. Might be a long vacation, or he may surprise himself and us.I just hope he's happy & safe. Thanks for the concern over him,Ro. He is such a nice young man.
possum under a rock
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74664:
Been a very busy day and finally have an opportunity to check in. Not much to report.
Seems like a quiet day on the porch today.
Glad to know Laci is liking school and the little red-headed boy, Possum. ;-)
I'm feeling a little frustrated tonight. We are still dealing with the problem at church that I mentioned a few weeks back and we aren't making any progress. The family is still not willing to meet with the pastor or us (even though the pastor told them nearly 2 weeks ago that they needed to meet with him and he wasn't asking, he was telling) and Bruce is getting pretty upset. I am afraid he is going to get mad and do something drastic, like leaving the church. I am hoping our pastor will follow through and help us in this situation. He is a very non-confrontational person and has "dropped the ball" before when we needed him. There is no doubt he is a great friend and we love him very much, but we are in a difficult situation and it is like pulling teeth trying to get people to do what they need to do. We are doing all we can.
Well, time to shower and crawl into bed. I am beat!
August 19, 2009 - Msg 74665:
By the way, not that any of you would, but I would like to ask any of my facebook friends to please not mention anything about the problem I was sharing on facebook. Thanks.
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74666:
My prayers are with you and yours Boo.
"We are ne every morning" the Bible says,
so I'm believing for you all when you greet the day!
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74667:
new, not ne!! I need some sleep too! ha
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74668:
Good evening, porch. Boo, it appears to me that the time has come to tell that family in no uncertain terms that you're sick of being treated this way, and if they won't agree to meet with you and the pastor, then you will present it to the church as a congregational concern. Tell your pastor first, that you're going to do that.
It's a cryin' shame when a family of God has such a thing going on, but it's nothing new. Paul had to mediate disagreements more than once, he dealt with troublemakers, and there is scriptural procedure that can be followed to remedy the situation. I think I told you all once before about a time in the little church I grew up in, when a family was asked to leave the church. They were causing great discord, gossiping and spreading flat-out lies, deliberately trying to stir up trouble. Why, I'll never know, but my dad thought they didn't like the pastor for some reason and were trying to ruin "his" church. The pastor counseled them, they were unrepentant and continued the behavior, and finally the church met in council and just simply told them their names were being removed from the church roll by erasure, and they should find another church home. The point was clearly made that the action in no way had any implications regarding their salvation, that's strictly up to God. They were simply found to be unable to get along in that particular congregation and therefore should move on.
That was the only time I've ever seen that done, and I've been in a Baptist church all of my 70 years. I do know that my dad was in favor of the action, and he was the least judgmental of all men. If he thought it necessary, then it was. Now, as for your pastor, I know he's your friend and I'm sure he's a good man, but shame on him for dragging his feet and not taking the lead in this unfortunate situation. These people are poisoning the congregation and causing great harm. Also, this is a "teachable situation" for that family - they need to learn a lesson here.
Possum, hooray for Laci. Just starting school and already has a boyfriend! Good for her - and a little red-haired boy at that - another Opie!
Well, I'm off to bed. Be blessed, friends. --Romeena
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74669:
One correction - I have seen one other somewhat similar situation. My brother's first marriage ended in divorce, when he walked in unexpectedly one day, and literally caught his wife with another man, in their bedroom yet. He just turned around and walked out, stayed with my parents that night, and filed for divorce the next day. Anyway, over time he got over it, met his present wife in the Singles department at church and they got married. First wife moved back to Michigan, to her family. About a year later, the first wife returned to Texas and showed up in our church! Just strolled in, found my mother and proceeded to sit down beside her as if nothing had ever happened! My brother and his bride were sitting about two rows further down, but did see her. My mom made some excuse about going to the restroom, and got up and moved to another seat.
The following Saturday, as I was conducting a garage sale, who should come in, pull up a chair and plop herself down beside me? Yep. All friendly, full of conversation, inviting me to lunch, etc. This from a girl who had invited us to her home exactly twice in the three years she was married to my brother. I was civil but cool and she finally left. The next morning, she shows up in church again but couldn't sit by any of us, as we had made sure there was no room.
That afternoon, our pastor called me and asked, "Was that who I think it was who sat by your mother last week, and who tried to do so again this morning?" I told him it was, and he said, "Don't worry, I'll take care of it." And he did. He got her address from the visitor's card, and went to see her. He told her that he was delighted that she was making finding a church home a priority upon her return to Texas, but that he didn't feel our church was the right place. He said there was a new young marriage at stake, less than a year old, and they didn't need any outside stress. He told her there were several fine churches in the area, and he would be happy to refer her to any of them, but he would not suggest that she join ours. I guess she got the point, because she didn't show up anymore, and in a few weeks, we learned through the grapevine that she had returned to Michigan once again. She had clearly come here to try to get my brother back, as she had absolutely no ties here except our family.
There are two points here - one is that there are people who are just determined to make trouble. The other is that sometimes it's up to the pastor to take the lead and do whatever is necessary to persuade the troublemakers to either cease and desist, or move on. A difficult and distasteful job, to be sure, but it comes with the territory.
Be blessed. --Romeena
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74670:
I agree with what you are saying, Romeena. I found out this week that this woman has been shunning the pastor and his wife, too because she thinks they are playing favorites or some such ridiculous notion. They have bent over backward for that family and I think that the reason they have not left is because our church will tolerate their son's behavior. Like the pastor said, "She won't go somewhere new where they won't tolerate her son's behavior", but that's the whole problem. The behavior has been tolerated for all these years because the parents refuse to do anything. I was remembering a time several years ago, that the boy stole something out of one of the sunday school teacher's purses. The teacher saw him do it, so there was no question even though the boy lied to everyone, as is his custom (because it works for him). The teachers went to the pastor and asked him what should be done about it. Nothing was done because everyone has the same old attitude that it won't matter because the parents will believe him and do nothing. But, it was wrong for the pastor to do nothing about it. It could have been an opportunity to make them face their responsibility as the boys parents, and the boy could have learned that there are consequences to his actions (something he has never been taught, believe me). Anyway, I just don't understand why, if his parents don't like the pastor, and don't like the deacon's family (us), why do they even want to stay? She doesn't want to be confronted, she doesn't want to talk about the situation, she just wants to give everyone the big freeze, I guess. She is very disrespectful and has always seemed to have no or very limited interest in spiritual things. She goes to church because of her children. It's a very sad situation.
Well, I AM going to bed this time!
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74671:
Just read your last post, Romeena...I guess we were posting at the same time. Wow, that is a pastor who is being a true shepherd to the sheep. This sheep (me) feels a bit left to the wolves. ;-)
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74672:
Oh, and thank you for sharing your experiences with me. It helps more than you probably know. You're a good friend, Ro.
And thank you for your prayers MDC. They mean so much, as always.
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74673:
Well, maybe I'm not going to bed...HAHA...I should just shut up and quit saying I am. One more thing that I found interesting/sad about this family is that the children (ages 12 and 9) sleep in the same bed with their mother, and Dad sleeps on the floor. Now, that is so warped. What man would stand for that? They really need help. Wish they would find it.
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74674:
Morning Porch, just thought I would check in before my day gets started. I am sure everyone is busy as I am. Rainy today with more rain expected. Hopefully things will clear by the week end and the race fans will not be disappointed in Bristol. They are tried and true loyal fans. No much to report from my end of the porch,things. Look kinda quite actually.
Breakfast menu will be: bacon and egg sandwhiches, garden tomatoes, cereal and fruit.
coffee, tea and orange or cranberry juice to drink. see you at breakfast.
Have a great day. Prayers and blessing to all.
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74675:
Stepdad is starting to be his good old self and is taking his med.
Now I have to have a long talk wite his Doc about a miss up.
Will it had rain some in the pass two day and is calling for more rain today.
THE LORD ISMY STRENGTH AND
MY SHIECLD, IN WHOM MY HEART
TRUSTED AND FOUND HELP.
SO MY HEART REJOICES; WITH MY
SONG I PRAISE MY GOD.
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74676:
Morning all. Had a busy morning at work so I'm a bit late checking in.
Great breakfast Maude. Thanks. It was pure gala.
Gald your Step Dad is doing better Tom.
I stii say be patient Boo. Don't let someone else dictate where you go to church. The other family sounds like they are ready to implode to me anyway. I bet the Lord has a lesson or a plan for you in all this. Anyhow, that's my thoughts on it.
Hey Possum. Is Laci a flirt? Does she take after her grannyma? :)
We are supposed to be near 100 for the next few days and then get some cooler weather for next week. Highs in the 70's all next week. I went up one of our mountain passes last night that gets to about 8,000 feet, and sure enough, some of the tree's on the peaks are starting to change color. You can definatly feel a touch of Fall in the air here in the morning now. And I just recieved a butt load of work orders on doing jobs to prepare equipment for winter. Dang and double dang. Summer has been to short for me.
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74677:
I meant still Boo.
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74678:
Tom- nice poem, real nice! Is it one of the Psalms?
I was searching the web last night and went to
which is dedicated to Howard Morris. It was interesting reading about all that he did.
ASA- maybe the 100s will finally melt all the
snow! haha BTW, it will be late October before we feel any hint of "fall, " which for us just
means "less hot!" ha
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74679:
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74680:
It's me, it's me , it's Ernest T !!!
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74681:
I knew what you meant, ASA, and I would like to be patient and wait it out but my husband isn't the sort who will, I'm afraid. I am praying he keeps his cool!
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74682:
Hey gang...been busy all day..had to get my truck serviced,brakes,tires...whew try putting 6 on one...$$,,let me whup up supper right quick and get back to my mowing..hey possum,asa,boo,ro,MDC and all will be in there tonight....supper:grilled pork chops,greenbeans,cream red taters,maude slaw,fried okra and Boo tea....SPOT
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74683:
Good grief, Boo! That family is in serious need of help, prayer, etc., but nothing is going to help them until and unless they are ready to accept it. Kids of that age sleeping with their mother, and the dad sleeps on the floor??? That's sick, weird. There's the problem right there. The dad has no control over anything, obviously. I can just picture Dale sleeping on the floor while the kids slept with me! Ha! That idea wouldn't have even gotten out of the chute. Obviously the dad is completely ineffectual, the mom is in charge and she has about as much sense as a rock. In a case like this, gentle leading and counseling isn't going to work. They need a bucket of cold water, and being asked to remove themselves from the membership for the good of all might just do it.
It may be true that they're about to implode, but I just hope the congregation doesn't fracture first, and that could easily happen. A teacher actually saw him stealing from a purse, the pastor knows it, and has done nothing? I'm sorry, but he is being negligent in his responsibility toward that child. A church is a place to worship, a place of refuge, and it is also a place to grow and develop spiritually, and sometimes this involves correction, as unpleasant as that may be. If the parents won't do it, then the pastor must. In this case, the discipline will have to extend to the parents as well, as troublemakers within the fellowship. Again, it's scriptural. Look it up. Start with Matt. 18, and check I Cor. 5, also.
Prayers for you and Bruce, your pastor, and the whole situation. One thing is certain, something needs to be done, and it must begin with the pastor. I believe I would have a frank talk with him, explain that you believe it is his right and responsibility as the leader to initiate measures to correct the problem. Then explain that if he refuses to act, that you will, and take another family or two along, as the scripture directs. Go in love, offering them forgiveness and restoration, but if they refuse, then you have scriptural backing to ask them to leave. You are not "throwing them out of God's family", you're just asking them to find another place to worship where perhaps they'll fit in better. If that doesn't open their eyes, nothing will.
Well, gotta go clean the pond filter. Yuck, now I'm going to be all sweaty. Be blessed, all. --Romeena
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74684:
Well Ro, Bruce has had a talk like that with the pastor weeks ago and told him that he needed to be a shepherd. That was when he started to move forward and told the man of the family that it wasn't an option and he needed to meet with them. That was almost 2 weeks ago and nothing has been done and things are getting worse. Last night Bruce told me that we would be going to another church on Sunday. After talking about it for awhile, he said he would call and talk to the pastor one more time and let him know where he stands and that he has been wrong by avoiding the problem. I'll let you know what happens. Bruce has been to him a few times, made it known that his family is hurting and he feels like nobody cares. Maybe it is best to move on. I guess we'll see.
I know what you mean about Dale. I am a very strong believer in kids sleeping in their own rooms and a man and his wife sleeping in the same bed unless there are medical issues or something. Bruce would never allow something like that. He is like a dog with his bone when it comes to his bed...nobody is takin' it from him! That bed is one in a million. Talk about comfort!
Gotta go get haircuts for the kids.
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74685:
Pond filter is now clean, fish are happy. Cleaning lady is sweaty, dirty and none too happy. However, a shower will fix all that. Often, as I stand in my shower with an abundance of water flowing over me, I think about our troops in that dreadful heat, all that sand, and probably only getting "helmet baths" most of the time. Bless their dear hearts - pray for them, please.
Boo, it sounds like you and Bruce have done about all you can do. I applaud you both for sticking it out this long, and especially for being willing to try one more time. I'm afraid if nothing happens after that, then perhaps the pastor is part of the problem, and it is time to move on. Who knows? Maybe the Lord has another place of service in mind for you - you never know.
On the subject of kids sharing the parental bed - I'll never understand that. I just don't think it's healthy. Oh, we would get our kids in our bed sometimes on a Saturday morning, watch cartoons with them, snuggle them for a while, and then we all got up. Or a very sick child was sometimes brought in with us for safety's sake, but more often, I would sleep in their room.
When I was in high school, I often slept over with my closest friend, as teenage girls will do, and after a while I realized that her father slept in the guest room, and her little brother, who was 8-10 during those years, slept with his mother. I thought it was odd, but being a teenager, it wasn't uppermost in my mind. It sure came back to me years later, though, when I learned that he had committed suicide at the age of 23. Connection? I don't know, but I wouldn't be surprised.
At work, we had a woman who came in to deliver her fifth child, and her husband - a strange character to say the least - came to the desk and demanded that a king-size bed be placed in his wife's room, "like we have at home". Told that we had none, he asked that THREE beds be placed together. Told that we had no extra beds and the room wouldn't hold them anyway, he pitched a fit. Told us they practice the "family bed", and all the children were accustomed to sleeping with them, and the new baby would be there too, they wouldn't need the little "box thing". Naturally, we told him that while in the hospital the "box thing" would be used, for safety, and that the children couldn't stay overnight anyway, let alone in the same bed with their mother. We suggested he take them home, and let them sleep wherever and however they were accustomed to doing. He ranted and raved, threatened to sue, etc., but finally took his noisy little brats and left. The exhausted mother got a good night's sleep, the baby slept safely in the "box thing", and the mom even allowed it to stay in the nursery overnight, since her husband wasn't there to object. Poor woman.
Well, off I go. Be blessed! --Romeena
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74686:
People have some "interesting" ideas about parenting. I would have been afraid to sleep with my little ones when they were newborn. They were so tiny (and I am a big mama). I was afraid I would smother them in my sleep...sounds funny but it happened to a family here in town not long ago. It was the dad that rolled over on the baby in the night. Can you imagine the horror of that?! I remember my mom telling me once that when my sister was a baby, and woke up at night for a feeding, she would bring her into bed to breastfeed her. Well, one night she fell asleep while feeding the baby and when she woke up in the morning, the baby was on the hardwood floor beside the bed. She was ok and didn't even cry when she rolled off the bed, I guess (I always said my sister sustained brain damage at some point...maybe that was the time...hehe). I put my children in a crib to sleep, with no bulky blankets, pillows or toys. I swaddled them up tight and put them in the crib to sleep. Worked for me, anyway. Well, come to think of it, I used to let Sean sleep with me now and then when he was a baby but he was never a good sleeper so I determined not to make the same mistake with Erin. She slept in the crib from day one. The only time she has ever slept with me is when she was sick enough for me to be worried about her. The family bed wouldn't have worked for me. I am what they call a "selfish sleeper"...I CANNOT be crowded and I sleep with 4 different pillows stratigically placed for my maximum comfort. I can't stand for any part of any person to be touching me when I sleep...now you know what I mean by a selfish sleeper. ;-)
Why did I write so much about that?! I need to get a life, i guess...wonder if TAGS is on...
Yes Romeena, I have considered that maybe there is another place we should be but I am having trouble with that one. I certainly don't feel like that's the case but I may just be spiritually hard-headed or something.
Better go check on dinner. I made beef stew and it is divine! I am a good stew maker, for sure. Ya'll come and eat with us...
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74687:
I don't go for that baby & kids in the bed stuff either,y'all. And as far as your trouble with that church family,Boo,as much as I am sorry for what your family is dealing with, I think I feel even sorrier for that other family .You have a good, strong,grounded family. It sounds like theirs is full of issues. I will pray things work out.
I remember you telling us about the boy stealing at church-that was some time back! If they have been wreaking havoc for that long a time,yes,the Pastor SHOULD do something. They haven't upset "my" Jubi in any way,have they? Don't make me come to Texas! Ha! How is she doing lately?
Well,my nephew Andy & family made it to Wyoming. They are currently in a motel and it seems they may have trouble finding a house to rent. Some local guy told them that folks out there pretty much hunker down and hang onto their homes,so the pickins' might be slim. I know my sister said they looked online before they left SC & all of the houses showing were little and that she was NOT going to live in a tiny little house! She told my mama today when they spoke that if they don't get out of motels in the next few days,she's coming home!
So... the fun has only begun. Heaven help 'em.
Will keep y'all updated as we hear. Thanks again for the prayers I know are being prayed for them.
Okie Dokie,guess I'll go watch some evening news on the tv. Need to check the latest on Hurricane Bill. So far,predicted not to come our way-praying it stays away from land.
I want some beef stew,Boo! I looked at the ingredients today at the store,but didn't buy them. I just didn't want to cook,to be honest! When it gets hot like it's been lately,don't really care to eat much anyway. But,that stew sounds good-I'll join ya!
possum under a rock
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74688:
I hear you, Possum. I don't feel sorry for us, I feel sorry for them. They have quite a rough road ahead and I feel for the children. Oh, and no, Jubi is not involved in any way but if they do anything to her I will tell you.haha By the way, Jubi is looking really good and healthy these days. :-)
Bruce did contact the pastor one last time and he told Bruce that he called the woman involved and asked her again if she would meet with us and him and she said she "wasn't ready", which I am certain is another stall tactic. He was ready to put things off again and Bruce was very honest with him about what he thought should be done and he told pastor that he was really angry right now. He also told him that he would need to find someone else to teach his sunday school class on Sunday. Bruce told me he just wants to take his family and go out of town for the weekend, which I think is a really good idea. There are other factors in this story that I would like to share with you that would make all of this easier to understand, but I can't. Anyway, it's no fun. I have learned so much from it, though, already and I am hoping that everyone involved will learn something from all of this. So for now I am sort of just in limbo, waiting to see what will happen, but I am ok and feel alot of peace. Thanks for your prayers!
Possum, that's just crazy? I can't imagine someone moving their family off like that without having prepared ahead of time to have some kind of housing or at least an apartment. Does he have a job yet? Prayers continue... Yep, c'mon over; the stew is great.
Think I will go out to the homestead this evening and spend some time on my front porch. I will be thinking of all of you!
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74689:
Gosh, Boo, I wish I could come and sit with you. I'll bet we'd get all the world's problems straightened out, don't you agree? I'm so sorry that woman won't consent to a meeting and try to iron out the difficulties. Obviously, she knows she's at fault, or she'd be first in line for a confrontation. Sad.
Possum, I agree with Boo. Your BIL must be a brick shy of a load, to drag his family out there with absolutely nothing secured in the way of housing or a job. A sensible man would have at least gone first, found housing and got a job, even a temporary one, before uprooting everyone and schlepping them across the country. Obviously, there's something at work in his head, wish I knew what it is.
Well, I think I'll go cuddle little Starr and see what's on TV. A big glass of tea sounds good, too. It has been very hot today, still 92 degrees at 9:30 p.m. Now that's hot, dang hot! With humidity to match, too.
Be blessed, friends. --Romeena
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74690:
Wow, Asa, you described your weather forecast exactly like ours. It's been 100 for the last 2 days, and supposed to be 101 tomorrow, then way cooler this weekend and during the week. 70's. I think you get more snow in the winter, but otherwise, we have similar climates. I can't believe how fast the summer has gone. sigh Mr. Hazel starts back to work in a little over a week. (he's a school bus driver)
Those church folks giving you the trouble sound like real winners, Boo. And it's puzzleing to me too as to why they even want to be there. Obviously they have conflicts with folks there. Why would they want to stay, unless they've worn out their welcome in other churches in the area?
The whole thing reminds me of something that happened years ago, which really doesn't have anything to do with your situation. Just kind of a sweet memory that I pull out and think about once in awhile. I worked at a place years ago with a gal named Pam. Just the sweetest person, kind, sang like an angel, great gal. I became good friends with her, and actually we only lived 2 houses away from each other, so we walked together to work and did stuff on the weekends. She was also very good friends with another girl there, Lana. (I guess we weren't girls, we were all around 22 or 23.) Well, I didn't care for that other friend, and she didn't care for me. And it wasn't anything to do with jealousy, like who was the better friend to Pam or anything. It was more that the other friend just bugged me to tears. She was so imature, kind of gossipy, and a real whiner. I couldn't stand to socialize with her at all. And, apparently I bugged her too (imagine that? me with an anoying trait). Anyhow, the 3 of us could never do anything together because of the conflict between Lana and I. Pam would always say, I wish we could all do something together this weekend, but both Lana and I always avoided going to anything when the other would be there. Pam would say, if only you could get to know her, you'd like her... (boy this story is going on and on - but almost finished...) Long story short, Pam was killed. It was an awful time for everyone at work, she had a lot of friends, and everyone loved her. We were all in shock. A couple weeks after it happened, it just popped into my head to ask Lana to lunch one day. We talked about Pam, and about how we both knew that she used to pray for us to somehow start liking each other. Well, we talked, cried, even laughed. And the funny thing was, she never got on my nerves again. I saw her thru Pam's eyes after that, I guess. The things that got to me before, seemed all part of her cute personality now. I honestly could not even remember what bugged me about her before. It may seem corny, but I've always thought it was a miracle. The way both of our hearts were softened and changed. We have both moved on in life, as people do, but we have stayed friends. I guess what made me remember that story was thinking about your trouble at church. There's many people praying for the sitution, but those key players, that couple, need to pray too. I don't mean to sound judgmental, but it doesn't sound to me like they have too much relationship with God. You would think they would want the situation to be better too, and pray for that goal.
Gosh, another novel. Sorry.
I can look at hummingbirds for hours too, Ro. (if only they would stay around that long). Ours flies in, gets a drink at the feeder, then goes around to all my flowers. Then disapears for awhile and then comes back. I always try to have my camera at the ready, but he's too quick for me. (Like Barney, no one's ever been able to successfully photograph his Quick Draw)
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74691:
Yep, we would get them straightened out, Ro. ;-)
I was thinking out on the porch and remembering some things concerning others in the church, too. I ran into an old friend who used to attend our church and has been gone for several years. She and her husband and little girl were a nice family. At that time there was a nursery worker who was hired from outside the church and she was caught really yelling at the small children more than once. The women in the church were very upset (including the pastor's wife). Nothing was done, so this friend that I mentioned and her husband went to the pastor and explained that they didn't feel comfortable leaving their little one with the woman and pastor wouldn't act and let the abuse woman go. My friend and her family left the church. I never knew why they left until I ran into her recently and she just up and offered the story without any prompting on my part. Then I remembered my friend Tammy who invited a friend to church a few years ago. It turns out that this friend was real trouble when she joined the church. she was a bit mentally unbalanced and began to spread terrible lies about Tammy. Tammy went to the woman and attempted to talk with her, that didn't work so she and another friend went to pastor's office to ask him what to do. Tammy told me at the time that the pastor just "blew her off" and she was not happy about it. Later that same woman went on to be very ugly to my mother-in-law, which may not have happened if the problem had been dealt with at the time, because the woman was blatantly slandering Tammy. I also recently found out that two other strong families within the church (both men were deacons in the church) left the church for similar reasons...couldn't get the pastor to act on things that they believed needed to be dealt with. Then there was the time years ago that I told you all about in which one of my friend's little girls was s#xually abused by a teenaged boy in the church. Bruce as a deacon, was very concerned and went to the pastor (the boy had been working in the nursery with his grandmother). He thought pastor would need to deal with it. He never did. Said something about needing to stay out of it so he could minister to both families involved. He dropped the ball right in Bruce's and my lap on that one. We had to be the ones to deal with it and arrange a meeting with the parents of both kids. It went well and things worked out because Bruce set down some rules that needed to be followed. That has always bothered Bruce that the pastor left him alone to deal with that terrible mess. It was a nightmare, believe me. I just don't get it. He knows he isn't doing right by us because he has said it and apologized to us more than once for, "not following through". Hard to understand. I don't have any hard feelings towards him and i will love him until the day I die, but I am having a hard time understanding all of this, but as Scarlett O'Hara would say, "I'll think about it tomorrow"...Now I hope none of you are thinking, "Frankly my Dear, I don't give a d@mn!" :-);-)
Where is everyone today? Hope I didn't run them off with my problem!
August 20, 2009 - Msg 74692:
Oh hey there, Hazel! I have asked myself that question a hundred times. Why do they want to stay in the church? The only thing i can think of is either for spite or because their kids don't want to leave (it's all about what the kids want).
Hazel, loved the story and you wouldn't believe how many similarities there are to my own story. The woman I have been talking about was a good friend of my best friend Karen, who passed away. Exact same situation. Karen would want the three of us to do things together but I would avoid "the woman" (ok, I'll call her by her initials...CC) because she drove me nuts. She is very rude and used to take advantage of karen all the time and push the kids around in order to favor her son. I really had issues with her. Well, when Karen died, I felt very different about CC for the first time. I had a real fondness for her and felt alot of compassion because losing Karen really hurt her, too. I thought she felt the same way about me but it seems she didn't. Your story is very encouraging. Who knows what the power of prayer can accomplish? My heart is soft towards her and maybe God can soften her heart. Thanks for the encouragment. Can't imagine you having an annoying trait...never! ;-)
August 21, 2009 - Msg 74693:
Morning folks. And it's Friday! Yabba dabba doo!
What a sweet story Hazel. I really enjoyed that. Thanks for sharing it with us.
Has anyone been looking at Mars at night? It's supposed to be as close to the earth as it has been in a long time, and will be in a long time. I keep forgetting to look at night for it. I'm going to try to this weekend.
Guess I'll go see what the Diner has for breakfast.
August 21, 2009 - Msg 74694:
I wonder if it was Mars I was seeing last night. I noticed a bright start that seemed to be nearer the horizon. At first I thought it was the bright North star, but I realized I wasn't facing North...I really don't know much about astronomy.
Meet you at the diner, ASA. I'll buy. Let's sit in a booth, drink lots of coffee and unscrew the lids on the salt and pepper. ;-)
August 21, 2009 - Msg 74695:
You know what I think I'm gonna do (since my sciatic back pain is acting up)...I am gonna get me another cup of coffee...get in the recliner with my heating pad....watch some TAGS...yep, that's what I'll do...another cup of coffee...heating pad....TAGS...
There were two great Bette Davis movies on Turner Classic's yesterday and I watched them both! I felt so cheap and dirty....boy, it was fun, though. Should have doin' chores and now I can't with my back acting up..hehe.
August 21, 2009 - Msg 74696:
Boo- just to change the topic, how is the new home coming along?
August 21, 2009 - Msg 74697:
THANKS, MDC! I need to talk about something else.
Well, the house is coming along. I noticed that the pillars for the front porch came yesterday. I think the roof might be next to go on. The electrician has been working his hiney off out there in the heat and there are those neat yellow wires betweent the 2x4's and hanging from the ceilings. Most of the light things (for lack of a better word) are in place, as well as the "things" where the switchplates and outlets will be. Like someone said, once the structure is up and the more detailed work begins, things seem to move slower. I'm not complaining, though. We are already ahead of schedule. Thanks for asking!
August 21, 2009 - Msg 74698:
Hey gang just been busy here with storms...do yall have "Folks" in your area?...good eating joint....yall meet Miss Sherry and I there at 5:30....im buying Boo bring a paper please...SPOT
August 21, 2009 - Msg 74699:
Good afternoon, porch. Hazel, I really enjoyed your story, and obviously, it struck a chord with Boo as well. Thanks for sharing.
Boo, it's becoming clear that the real problem in the church is not so much that family, as it is the pastor. I'm sorry to say that, but if he can't face conflict and deal with it, then he's completely ineffectual as a leader. That's a long history of problems you outlined, and his inaction is a key factor in every situation. What's it going to take to stiffen his spine and force him to act? I'm thinking it came close with the case of the teenage boy who abused the little girl. He could have been very close to a lawsuit against the church with that one, for failing to protect the child and for doing nothing after the abuse was discovered. If I was the mother of that little girl, I'd have been in his face, for sure. Not because it happened - no one can guarantee that something like that won't occur - but because he just blew it off. He should have insisted on professional counseling for the boy, at the very least, and maybe for the little girl as well, depending on her age and level of understanding.
Well, enough from me. Blessings, y'all! --Romeena
August 21, 2009 - Msg 74700:
I hear ya, Romeena. In that particular situation, Bruce dealt with it and insited on the counseling for both parties, and they did it. If he hadn't done something, nothing would have been done I don't believe. I remember at the time that this was happening I told my sister about it (remember, she is a church secretary). She couldn't believe that the pastor wouldn't get directly involved and told me at that he will be very lucky of the church isn't sued one day. Sounds really crazy, doesn't it?